Because I could not stop for Death, he asked me for cab fare.
One of the ways in which most games utterly fail to resemble reality is the fact that, over the course of the game arc — especially in persistent stuff like MMOs or long-running tabletop campaigns — our characters always get stronger. Every time we reach a new level, we get some more hit points, learn some new skills, and basically become more bad-ass. Depending on where the level cap is, this might take quite a while in terms of both real time, and game time, to achieve. Our characters, in short, will get older.
Quick show of hands: How many folks do you think were afraid of getting their butt kicked by George Burns circa Oh God, You Devil?
That’s what I thought. Sure, there are the occasional outliers like Mr. Miyagi or Chuck Norris, who continue to display physical prowess despite advancing years, but for us mere mortals, time will eventually start to catch up with us. Like the Parthenon or Colosseum, the ravages of the years will break us down.
Or will it?
The picture is far from clear, but the majority of the news is good. On the one hand, some studies suggest that vigorous exercise in middle age may lead to certain types of late-life health issues. Yes, even of those in deep denial are still inexorably approaching forty, and it’s getting closer. It should be noted that this is referring to a fairly specific (though common) type of osteoarthritis, and there are still plenty of ways to remain healthy and active that won’t anger Arthritulus, the Cranky Bone God. Low-impact exercises like walking, biking, and using an elliptical trainer don’t inflict the same kind of wear and tear on the body that weekends spent playing pick-up games of hockey or basketball do.
Much like Mr. Norris, when it comes to sports, I also have two speeds: “Walk,” and “Kill.” At this point, I suppose my only hope is that we get those Dune-style hover chairs sometime in the next thirty or forty years. Any mechanical engineers in the audience, please get cracking.
Even the mere act of gaming has been blamed for causing pain and discomfort in those of us with three dozen years under our belt (with an off-hand remark about it causing joint pain in children. The cynicist in me says, “Doing anything repetitive for hours at a time is going to make you stiff and sore”). As the calendars keep piling up, the news doesn’t exactly get better, since overall fitness begins to wane once we hit our mid-40′s. We can slow this process by eating well and staying active, of course. “The data showed that if people had that advantage when they were in their 30s and 40s and maintained that lifestyle, their aerobic capacity as they aged was, in fact, higher [than their more sedentary counterparts],” said Andrew Jackson, the study’s author.
The same things that can make us healthy when we’re young will keep us healthy when we’re old. Whether or not we’re up for a few games of Twister when the Grim Reaper shows up remains to be seen.
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